Tuesday, September 27, 2005

smetimes, it's not tt i dun 1 2 talk......it's juz never e rite time.......once e issue is over, it's pointless 2 say anything.....i dunno......mayb i shldnt worry or care so much......but it's precisely cos i care so much tt i dun 1 2 say or do anything tt i dun tink it's rite.....haizzzz.....e only word which has bec a comfort.....haizzzz.....trying so hard 2 juz breathe....trying hard not 2 tink too much.....trying hard not 2 b unhappy......trying hard not 2 cry......trying v v hard.....there r a million & 1 pple out there who r worse off den me....but i dun care abt tt.....i juz 1 2 feel gd....i juz 1 2 b happy.....

i juz 1 2 b like b4.....is it juz so hard????

breathe......

haizzzzz....

haizzzzz......tt's e only word which i can say.........so many unhappy things..........so wrong a time......haizzzzzzzz..........

how do i bec happy..............

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

freaked....

1st sms at 6.45pm, 19 Sep 05
yr attitude reminded me of Jennifers. She quitted her job b4 XXXXXX, too stressful 4 her. But u will stay through, right?

2nd sms at 7.09pm, 19 Sep 05
sometimes, I'm reminded of Sandy, Yee Sian, Mayyi, Jeniffer, and others etc.

3rd sms at 8.17pm, 19 Sep 05
That day, Jeniffer urgently insisted dat I help her write resignation letter. She said HR req 1 mth notice min, by 2pm. I'm around.. 2 serve my bond.

4th sms at 8.55pm, 19 Sep 05
Shuhui & Kathleen had also left within past 12 mths. Somehow, all of them looked very worried just before they left. A strange look on their faces..

5th sms at 10.45pm, 19 Sep 05
Just focus on e earlybird deadline & yr HR deadline. Don't worry abt myself.. My god-mother works as a Snr Mgr at Mediacorp, she can protect me.


wat wld u say she's trying 2 tell me???? i've no HR deadline. e earlybird deadline was on mon & i'm not in charge o registration, earlybird has nth 2 do wif me...She's not serving our company's bond...Jeniffer was e colic who was an RO who left...alll e other names r also colics in our centre who left....

i felt threatened, i felt scared o wat her mental state was....she sounds like a psycho 2 me at least....

Monday, September 19, 2005

beta.....

i've re-written e email courtesy of my Colic G....it looks & reads more professional.....i'm feeling beta after sending tt email......

stupid shit........

i'm sooooooooo upset......it's really not worth it 4 tis person..........but seriously i cannot not get upset...........i took > 1hr drafting an email.........but i must admit e email was filled wif emotion.......i cannot contain my anger.......really.........i juz feel like slapping her..........i've tots o using my tkd moves............i'm getting personal but i juz cant help it.........but i really glad my other colics r helping me..........haizzzzzzzzzzz..........wei shen me hui you zhe zhong xiao ren.........shit.......................

Friday, September 16, 2005

DEAR DEAR,我不想把心里的话写在这里。。。我想亲口跟你说。。。

SHE’S A BIG GIRL OREDI。。。

没有心情工作,SO BLOG LOH。。。

有时觉得很 BAD。。。因为每个人都针对她。。。让我想起了 JC 时的HQ。。。因为他有股味道让大家都不是很喜欢他,不敢接近他。。。刚开始没有人说什么。。。渐渐地,一个人开口,两个人讨论,三个人八卦,全班都有了同样的结论。。。他有股怪味。。。大家开始疏远他,OSTRACIZE 他。。。大家开始把他的所有举动,话,ANYTHING;当做话题来 GOSSIP。。。最后大概一班20个人,不到5个会和他说话。。。毕业后,他当兵。。。听说他TRY TO COMMITT SUICIDE。。。好可怜。。。

我常会想是不是因为JC 时的OSTRACIZING 使他变成这样。。。我常会想是不是我开始的。。。我常会想如果我没有 OSTRACIZE 他,结果会不会不同。。。

现在 L 也是被大家 OSTRACIZE。。。我会觉得很 BAD,很同情她。。。想想办法 REMEDY。。。可是她总是又做出让我很生气,很想扁她的东西。。。

我以尽量不要ADD ANY COMMENTS, 她做了什么我就 COMPLAIN 给HN 听。。。

真的不知道该同情她吗。。。我唯一能做的就是做好自己的工作。。。要和她合作的,我会很明确地交代她,不然就是INVOLVE BOSS 让BOSS让跟她说清楚。。。可是有BOSS EXPLAIN 她还是犯错。。。I GIVE UP REALLY。。。SHE’S A BIG GIRL OREDI。。。I DUN ND 2 SPOONFEED HER。。。I DUN 1 2 SWEEP HER SHIT 4 HER。。。ARGHHHH。。。。

希望她会开窍。。。

她和他心地都不错吧。。。可是SOMEHOW 他们就是KEEP STEPPING ON PPLE’S TOES。。。

NO CHOICE。。。THEY JUZ ‘VE 2 LEARN IT E HARD WAY I GUESS。。。

Thursday, September 15, 2005

一山比一山高。。。

昨天的MEETING让我更想扁人。。。一个比L还要欠扁的!!!不,应该是两个很欠扁的。。。她们的态度真的让我很怀疑为什么她们能爬得那么高!!!真得是一山比一山高,一扁比一扁扁。。。

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

scary!!!!

if u can enlarge e pic, u'll c e woman staring rite at e photographer!!! initially we were only caught by e "pei yong jun" pic, when i uploaded, tt woman stood out, i had a closer look....can really c e face....scary!!!!

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

look at e lady behind...eerie....

diff frequency....

有时真的很讨厌她的口吻。。。OK GOT UR PT,U DUN ‘VE 2 GO ON & ON。。。HAIZZZZZ。。。跟你有点DIFF FREQUENCY 吧。。。有时会觉得为什么没有人说你工作乱。。。你明明就很 DISORGANISED 。。。每次MEETING 我都找不到ANNEX。。。我会想是不是我太嫌东嫌西。。。BUT REALLY LOH。。。很难找到!!!MAYB 因为很迟才交ANNEX 给你BUT SMEHOW U SHLD MANAGE IT MAH。。。AIYA 算了。。。CONC ON MY MINS。。。

Thursday, September 08, 2005

一个回忆 part 1。。

梦见了他。。。顿时让我有点不知所措。。。为什么会梦见他。。。可是他的出现让我更确定我的选择。。。=)

Who needs marriage?

Been 1ing 2 blog abt e articles in today but never had time 2 do it...now it's summarised...i've more 2 elaborate but below's quite interesting enough....if u've e time, go look at e archives o e articles mentioned below....they made my blood boil everytime i tink abt wat they wrote!!! call me a feminist anything but seriously, MAN dun blame everything on nature....

anyway my pt is if u feel tt marriage is not 4 u den dun get married!!! b it 4 man or 4 woman!!! if u cant stay by e vows den dun...dun get married juz so tt u can legally 've sex...period.

TODAY 6 Sept 2005
Who needs marriage?
Yvonne Lim Voices editor

WERE readers' suggestions taken seriously, bridal salons must have had a nervous couple of weeks.

First, there was a reader's call for couples to do away with all that marriage nonsense and settle for living together — uncomplicated, no strings attached.

Then, others asked: Why not let people keep as many spouses as they want?

Cohabitation or polygamy — is either the answer to rising divorce rates and unfaithful spouses? Readers' letters that poured in ever since this paper ran the tale of Mrs Tan and her cheating husband ("Stay away from my husband, you hear!", Aug 19), were a remarkable reflection of Singaporeans' attitudes toward the institution of marriage.

They ranged from the wholly disillusioned and bitter to the practical "realists" and the moralists and idealists.

The debate began as a who's-to-blame game, with some like Valerie Cheong Soke Yan castigating letter-writer Mrs Lam who implied that if a wife couldn't hold on to her man — well, it was her fault.

Cheong responded: "I find it extremely shocking that the woman should shoulder complete blame if her husband philanders. Also, the very idea of a woman submitting to her man's every need makes me shake my head in disgust.

"An interesting perspective was offered by T M Tan, who said: "I know a woman who has been cheating on her husband for a year. Her husband treats her with kid-gloves, takes care of her every material need, but unfortunately, he's a doormat and, erm, an unskilled lover. Now I wonder, would he, like Mrs Lam, blame himself? More likely, he would bay for blood … cut off her credit cards, change the lock and send her back to her parents in disgrace."

But the real fireworks started when reader Wilson Wong suggested (Aug 23) that marriage be replaced with a cohabitation contract, because straying is in man's very nature and marriage does nothing for men, only for women.

In a blatantly sarcastic dig at this, Venee Rift proposed a radical "beehive" model of society, in which the queen and female bees matter and the males are expendable.

"On the same terms that women should no longer expect men to maintain a marriage, men should also no longer be required to care for their offspring nor, in return, should they request that their children provide for them when they are old.

"Under a cohabitation contract, the male should not be expected to care for the female he fertilises. Society instead should enable the women to care for herself … The cohabitation contract should endow the woman with the right to "put away" her husband if she no longer needs him, and provide her with a maid and nanny to enable her to fulfil her role as a working mother. Single women should be allowed to own houses upon maturity (21 years of age) and artificial insemination for single women should be legalised."

Seetha Sharma said: "Let's abolish marriage and replace it with cohabitation contracts. Then we don't have to put up with your families and do your washing and cooking. Most importantly, we won't have to bear your children.

"I wonder why Mr Wong's friends don't want to leave their marriages, if there is "nothing to recommend marriage to a man"… The truth is that men gain a lot from marriage — a free cook, maid, child bearer, sex partner and, in many cases, extra cash as most women work nowadays. Why would a man walk away from all this?"

Tan Chor Hoong saluted Wong for "putting the issue squarely on the table, because whether we decide to talk about it or not, the problem of straying spouses is prevalent". She added: "Recently, I asked a male friend, a habitual womaniser: 'Would you forgive and forget if your wife has a boyfriend ?' His immediate reaction was: 'I see no reason why she'd do that … I am able to satisfy her needs in every way.'

"He was visibly perturbed, hemming and hawing, red-faced ... This reveals a few things. Firstly, he had never given that issue any thought before. Secondly, he was embarrassed by even the thought of it. And finally, it was clear he was not going to grant a 'forgive-and-forget' blank check!"

Michael Yap, however, was all for Wong's idea, arguing: "It is not strange that girls cheat on their husbands too. Loyalty is no longer the key to marriage … Humans would resort to other means that revives the spark. Particularly if the woman goes out of shape (after giving birth) or is the spoilt-brat kind that likes to nag."

Yong Teck Meng spoke up for his men friends who stayed true to their families, despite temptations faced on business trips. "Given a second chance, they would all marry the same person again. So you see Mr Wong, your group of friends is not representative of all men," he added.

"For many people, sex is not just physical. If sex is all about doing it with the winners of beauty pageants, then there should be no couples that can stay together till old age. You mentioned that the shape of a woman changes after childbirth, but surely you are not Adonis all your life?

"Men (or women) who stray are simply people who forget that they have given their word to another person, to love her for good or for worse, in illness or in health, for richer or poorer, till death do them part. Temptations and problems will always be there in any marriage, or for that matter, any relationship. Do not blame nature for acts that are simply irresponsibility and immaturity at work," Yong concluded.

The same phrases — respecting sacred vows, making compromises, that it takes "two hands to clap", that marriage is a choice — cropped up in the many letters from readers who believed firmly in the old-fashioned ideals of marriage, and that a promise is forever.

On those same lines, some reacted with horror to Lim Thiam Poh's suggestion to "Stem divorce with polygamy" (Sept 2), which argued for accommodating men's "straying" tendencies in the multiple-spouse family unit.

But predictably, also, several readers retorted that if it were made legal for all men, then all women should likewise enjoy the freedom to marry multiple husbands. Others — including Muslim wife Haslinda Shamsudin (Sept 5) — pointed out that polygamy did not solve the problem of egos, jealousies, emotions and divided attention.

As Michael Loh Yik Ming asserted, the main challenge to marriage today isn't about philandering genes or how many spouses one could have — but the modern notion of equality. "How can a couple survive to their golden years together when they are constantly at loggerheads as to who is more correct in family decisions?

"When all is said and done, one real concern that arose out of the whole debate still remains unanswered: If and when things go wrong, do men walk away from the marriage with a raw deal, no thanks to local laws that dictate the paying of maintenance and the splitting of matrimonial property?

Wong Hoong Hooi ("Marriage? Laws are a raw deal for men", Aug 26) and Jimmy Ho Kwok Koong ("Women win, men lose", Aug 30) made a convincing case for this, which prompted Y L Chan to urge for a review of the laws, "otherwise, the judges' hands are tied".

一个回忆。。。

看到他真的有一点意外。。。没有很大的反应因为来不及反应。。。发型变了。。。有点认不得他。。。从他的眼神看到他认得我。。。没来得及对他微笑。。。谢谢你给我的记忆。。。欢迎你回来。。。希望你很好。。。

Monday, September 05, 2005

Little vampire...
Aftermath....
Potluck time at RNO again...
Walk walk walk...
Walk for the Children 2005

Friday, September 02, 2005

super-glue on her chair....

好久没 blog了。。。好忙。。。sudden influx o work。。。more projects parked with me...& i've 2 cover a lot o her work at e same time...i dunno if i'm stupid or not 2 cover 4 her...HS was so angry juz now at lunch...she complained abt L...i didnt know she was storing up all these frustrations...i tot i was e 1 who was not managing L well...i was stupid 2 do alot o e things when in fact it was L's work...i juz didnt 1 her 2 mess up things 4 me....& i dun 1 2 waste my time explaining things 2 her & in e end she does it wrongly again...she always tink abt all e irrelevant things...she always go ard in circles...ok in a gd way, she trying 2 tink o all e possible problems tt cld come up...but seriously, b4 u can care abt all e rest o e stuff, isnt it beta tt ur 份内的事以搞定???

haizzz...HS said if she left 1 day it must b cos o L...it was rather sad 2 hear tt...leaving bcos o sme1 so incompetent...i dunno...mayb if i can tolerate L no longer i might resort 2 tt 2...but at tis pt in time i've no wish 2 leave my job bcos o her...if i were 2 leave, it wld b tt i dun like my job annymore or tt i've found sme other beta work opportunity...not bcos o any1....i hope...

i was contemplating talking 2 L....trying 2 make her understd e problems tt we face when we work wif her....but everytime i c her, i juz cant control my emotions...i juz feel like "扁-ing" her!!!

juz cant seem 2 std her...dunno if S is doing anything or not...mayb it's like nee's x-boss : even though she knew A not competent but she still kp her...it's beta 2 kp a 烂的手 den 没有手...L has been wif e conference planning fr e start....quite a fair bit o things were parked wif her...at tis pt in time it'll b v bad if nd 2 train sme1 2 take over her job & every1 has a huge portfolio oredi...

it feels great 2 complain...it feels gd 2 know tt i'm not e only 1 suffering...it feels gd 2 know tt it's not cos o my own incompetence tt i'm not able 2 manage her...it feels great 2 c HN joke abt bashing her up, putting snake in her drawer, putting super-glue on her chair...hahahaaa....it's funny 2 c how frustrated she can make pple...at e same time i pity her...i dunno if she's doin all these things purposedly (so tt she can get away fr doing all e work while still remain employed...) or whether she's really like tt...HS say she's not gg 2 give her e benefit o e doubt cos she tinks L is doin it purposedly...L is in fact a PSC scholar...how dumb can she b??? she's oredi 30...it's not her 1st job...she shld b able 2 do alot more...

haiya...enough complaining o her....but she's a great topic o discussion anyway...