i was supposed 2 b so happy tis morning.....had a wonderful weekend.....

but.......

e 1st email i read tis morning.....made me feel so sad.....so angry....so disappointed......i worked so hard.....i admit i shld have cleared my doubts rite fr e beginning but how was i supposed 2 know wat i was supposed 2 know???? i wldn't know wat 2 ask until i've read/researched......

so upset......

his email sounded like i shld have done my research properly......tt i didn't put in effort 2 do my work properly.....he asked if i received his latest email.....regarding mtg on sats....he make me sound so stupid.....so unorganised abt e schedules....i didn't 1 2 b impolite so i wrote in my email tt 1 o e RAs didn't 1 2 have it on weekends...can't he read between e lines??? i'm trying my hardest 2 b polite......

y m i so upset????

haizzzzz.....

tis is e shittest day ever since i started work at scs.....

feel so sad........juz 1 email & i feel so bad......mayb it's juz tt i'm tired....didn't sleep 2 well last nite.....mayb juz tt i'm not feeling 2 well....been staying up late, staying in e sun 2 much & not eating properly......

excerpt fr conversation at swensons....

"u take e banana & i'll take e balls...."

sounds sinister???? hahahhaaa.....

they were talking abt e banana crumble & e chocolate malt ice cream....hehheee but taken out o context...really hmmmmm....

hehheeee...

finally i found e ans....

Goat meat is sometimes called chevon

mutton, lamb, sheep, goat.....

fr dictionary.com

sheep:

Any of various usually horned ruminant mammals of the genus Ovis in the family Bovidae, especially the domesticated species O. aries, raised in many breeds for wool, edible flesh, or skin.

goat:

Any of various hollow-horned, bearded ruminant mammals of the genus Capra, originally of mountainous areas of the Old World, especially any of the domesticated forms of C. hircus, raised for wool, milk, and meat.

lamb:

a. A young sheep, especially one that is not yet weaned.
b. The flesh of a young sheep used as meat.
c. Lambskin.

mutton:

The flesh of fully grown sheep.


so wat do u call e meat fr a goat???? mutton????

so when we have e mutton curry, which animal is it from???

m i such a "taken 4 granted" thing????

can any1 appreciate me????

y do i even bother?????

if u dun 1 2 go pls say it out straight....dun have 2 go 1 big round....

waste o my time.....

so tt's y i'm offline....

seriously i dun really 1 2 care abt how u feel loh.....

i dunno if u know i'm so pissed.....

i dunno y i must b so pissed.....

dun even bother talking 2 me......dun waste my time.....i tink i can do much more things.....

i sound so angry.....i dunno y but really dun 1 2 bother....dunno if u know who i'm referring 2 but i juz 1 2 voice it out.....

ST Jan 15, 2005, P 10

Trauma shows up in drawings and hallucination
GALLE (SRI LANKA) - PALESTINIAN children drew pictures of Israeli helicopters spitting gunfire when the intifada began; under the Taleban, Afghan children drew pictures of Islamic militants gunning down civilians.

In Sri Lanka these days, they are drawing dead bodies floating in giant waves.
'It's normal, children draw what they're experiencing,' said Dr Ajith Durusinghe, medical officer in charge of the Unawatuna psychiatric hospital in the tsunami-battered southern town of Galle.

'Children can't verbalise their feelings, so they use crayons and paper instead. It's an emotional release.'

Nursery school principal Chandra Koralage said the four-year-olds in her school, attached to the Kovillagodalla Buddhist temple here, had been 'unusually quiet'.

'They don't say much at all. They quietly play with handicrafts - and they draw a lot.'

Psychiatrist Manoj Kumara of Galle's Karapitiya Hospital said no one was sure of the Dec 26 tsunamis' long-term impact on the children of Sri Lanka, where more than 30,800 have been killed and nearly a million left homeless.

With relatives missing, homes swept away and familiar neighbourhoods turned into wastelands, it is clear that there has been great trauma.

Many people will develop what is called post-traumatic stress disorder. Symptoms include nervousness, insomnia and excessive worrying.

With children making up the biggest number of casualties, parents are expected to be wracked with guilt.

'If it's a case of a mother having been forced to give up one child to save another, the stress will be tremendous,' said Ms Linda Lam, a professor of psychiatry at Hong Kong's Chinese University.

In Thailand, tales of ghost sightings in the six worst-hit southern provinces have become endemic.

Spooked volunteers searching for bodies in the resort areas of Phi Phi Island and Khao Lak are reported to have looked for tourists heard laughing and singing on the beach, only to find darkness and empty sand.

Experts warn that it could be a result of mass trauma after living through the deadly waves and witnessing horrific scenes in their aftermath.

'This is a type of mass hallucination that is a cue to the trauma being suffered by people who are missing so many dead people, and seeing so many dead people, and only talking about dead people,' said Thai psychologist and media commentator Wallop Piyamanotham. \-- AGENCE FRANCE-PRESSE

ytd, my parents were talking abt e ghost-sightings at e disaster-hit places....i was rather sceptical abt it.....as it is, being psychology-trained, i didn't really tink there was such a thing as ghost...rather, i believe in dimensions.....when u die, u die....however there may b another u in another dimension & u r still very much alive there....smetimes we can accidentally step into e other dimensions & tt's when pple tink they r seeing smething supernatural.....i believe tt when u r emotionally & psychologically overloaded, u start 2 imagine a lot o things.....e neurons in ur brain r firing ever so fast & rapid tt e receptors may get all screwed up....all e hormones may also b cocked up....so tt's when u sense so many things which may juz b some hallucinations/illusions.....& i tink pple's minds r very active, they can conjure up anything......e sightings....i believe it's more o a psychological thing rather than supernatural.....

wonderful colleague :)

tt's how she describe herself lah.....i dunno wat i shld describe her la....i'm teaching her abt blogs & she 1s 2 know how 2 post smething on e blog....ok she is looking at me type all these things....ok we'll try posting now.....

hoping for gd news 2nite....

everything sucks 2day!!!! i was pretty happy & ready 2 go 2day when i came into office....but things juz didn't turn out as gd as e day went by......1st i knocked myself on e desk....a big balugu i got.....ouch.....still painful.....juz as things were looking up, my boss say probably send me or another colleague 2 USA 2 attend a conference....i hope it'll b me but tt will mean a lot o extra work.....i've oredi have a huge load on me.....wat wif my pri study gg a slightly different direction, an article waiting 2 b edited b4 being published, & o cos e conference at e end o e yr......& e tsunami relief work by e dragonboat community....i shldn't b doing so much things......y does things always come at e same time???? i'm so stressed.....& tis stupid article doesn't have e scale 1 1ed!!!! wat a waste o all e effort i put into finding it!!!!! 2 mtgs tmr....i hope everything ends well.....another mtg on fri......stressed......& e result 4 y tis day sucks!!!!! cos e stupid email doesn't work!!!! & my emails which i was rushing cldn't get 2 my boss!!!! then tt stupid cybersite pple & e lanworks pple went on their taichi moves!!!!! i was so angry!!!! i shldn't have got myself involved cos i'm not e IT person in my dept......wasted half o my afternoon away......now i've 2 4go a free ride 2 my tkd 2 do my things which i was supposed 2 do if i wasn't caught up wif e IT!!!!!! shoot.......& i'm 2 stoned 2 do work now......& i'm wasting my time blogging.......shoot........

i hope tt there'll b gd news at tkd 2nite.....i hope there're sme doubles after e grading......i hope.....

wat m i doing....

at my sis' place.....my nephew's bday......had tkd grading 2day....finally over....seniors said out o e 4 o us bound 2 've at least sme1 getting a double......i hope it's me but i dun tink i did very well.....

anyway, there's a whole load o pple inside tis room playing rummy-o while i'm blogging away down here....1 o my bro-in-law's niece is watching me as i type tis blog......

anyway, i'm rather sleepy cos i woke up early....was rather stressed last nite cos o e grading.....waited 4 quite sme time 4 my grading, e grp in front o us was unusually slow....e examiner kept asking them 2 re-do....wah liao.....brown belt leh.....they kick like shit....but they r kids la.....so ok loh.....

anywayz.....pple wayching me blog a bit stress....beta log off.....

wat do u do....

wat do u do when e man u r gg 2 marry cheats on u????

it's been in a span o last than 6 mths, & i came across 2 friends who found out tt their man cheated on them.......

fr my boss--3

probably wld b useful 2 any1 working wif children......since e disaster affects not juz those directly hit by e tsunamis.....

There are many websites dedicated to dealing with trauma/disasters, including this one. http://www.trauma-pages.com/pg5.htm
Also, Ricky Greenwald's - he specialises in treating children. http://www.childtrauma.com/index.html

The way in which people process such traumatic events normally is to go over and over them in their minds, tell the story over and over until the feelings are all worked through. Some people go through this process without developing PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) or needing therapy. With the enormity of this disaster and with the losses and subsequent stresses, such a process may take many months or some years to fully work through. The children who are suffering from acute stress mayor may not develop PTSD.

In my experience when I work with children, I find that they often know best how to work through their memories, emotions, grief and fears given adequate support. Some approaches I use include the following, depending on the child (and these could be used with groups)

1. Cognitive Behavioural approach to trauma (older children). An adult outlines the basic facts of the story of what happened (basic info about the fact that there was an earthquake, an earthquake of the magnitude that rarely occurs, and that it caused the huge Tsunami, so that the missing knowledge is supplied and the children understand better. It is important that the information is factual and does not minimise their experience, grief, suffering or fear, but also normalises their reactions. Address the exact questions asked, briefly and clearly to prevent confusions and misunderstandings. These questions are likely to move into the details of the affects of the Tsunami. Keeping this at a cognitive level as much as possible at first, helps prevent further trauma. Then each of the children can begin to tell the story from their personal perspectives, gradually putting it all together and making some sort of sense of it.

During this stage for healing to occur it is essential that each child feel sufficient emotion for processing, but NOT be overwhelmed by emotion/pain etc. or secondary traumatisation may occur. Every child will move at his or her own pace of course.

2. Drawing or other play approaches for younger children. Again, each child needs to know the basic facts. Each child drawing the event from his or her own perspective and doing whatever he or she wants to the drawing ensures that individuals deal with their feelings at their own pace. They may need to draw many pictures over a period of time. Some may want to "re-enact" the event with water etc. in a sand pit. Again the level of arousa lneeds to be monitored and enough individual support provided (by a significant adult if at all possible). Some children may choose to use symbolic things to deal with their traumatic experiences (for there would be many related to the Tsunami).

3. EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can be most effective if there are counsellors trained to use it.

4. Narrative Therapy is another approach.

guidelines for wellbeing of children--tsunami disaster....

fr boss---2

Psychosocial aspects of the Tsunami Disaster
What you can do to support children in disaster areas

§ For children, being able to trust at least one adult who can take care of them can pull them through stressful times. Therefore, helping children to maintain relationships with a family member or known person is very important.

§ It is not always the event that can have a psychological and emotional impact on the child, but the lack of emotional support, separation from parents or family, taken out of familiar context and community, and grief and distress of parents and adults in the aftermath of the disaster event.

§ Do not remove or separate children from family members. Do not separate siblings. If family members are missing try to keep the child with someone he/she knows and trusts and support that caregiver and child.

§ Identify informal care systems that exist in the community (relatives or neighbours taking care of children), and find out if traditional care systems have been affected by crises/disaster.
§ Moving a child from such informal care arrangements provided by the community or other family members could bring additional distress. A child should be moved only if the assessment shows that the child is suffering from emotional or physical abuse, exploitative labour, neglect, poor care or abandonment from these new care givers.

§ Provide economic, social and emotional support to these informal arrangements so that the child can remain in familiar surroundings and within relationships that they trust.

§ Children should be informed of care arrangements and be consulted in decision-making processes about their care.

§ Be honest and open about the disaster. Don’t be afraid to say, “I don’t know” and keep discussions about the their experiences open and honest.

§ In cases of children being separated from family members or siblings collect as much information as possible from the child, from the people the child was found with, and relatives/friends/school teachers. Give this information to groups documenting and working on missing people. If possible take a photograph of the child and attach to the file.

§ It is important to document all possible information as soon as the child is found. Please register separated children with relevant government authorities such as child probation offers, local police stations, divisional secretariats, etc. Record the following information: Name and pet name(whatever the child remembers), Age, Sex, Address or Village name, Names of family members, relatives (in the area and outside the area), friends and neighbours, Name of school, occupation of parents, where the child is located currently and where he/she may be moved.

§ Show the child to adults and children from the area that may recognise him/her before moving the child anywhere.

§ Establish a location where adults can also provide information about missing children and maintain detailed database on this.

§ If children are being moved for some unavoidable reason provide children with identity tags (with the above information), provide drivers of vehicles transporting children with rosters of names and other details of children, register children in location they are being moved from and give clear information about where they are being moved to. At all times, attempt to keep children close to their homes or at least within the town or district.

§ Try to involve older children and adolescents in activities carried out in the camp/displaced community – such as distributing goods, documenting information, caring for younger children etc.

§ All notices and information provided should be in simple language so that a child of 12 years can understand and follow it.

§ Be sensitive to special needs or adolescent girl children, such as menstruation, special clothing and undergarments, toilet facilities and safety.

§ Try to maintain a daily routine (however basic such as regular eating and sleeping times) for the child as much as possible.

§ If someone comes to claim a child, make sure that the child is able to identify the person. In all cases, take down information (ID number, address, contact details) of the person claiming the child prior to handing the child over. Remember that some people may be trying to take advantage of the situation to exploit such vulnerable children.

§ Anxiety, crying, sleeplessness, sadness, anger, restlessness, withdrawal, being very active, grief, shock, emotional numbness or expression is part of any normal human response to extremely stressful or dangerous situations.

§ Important: These are normal and expected reactions from children and should not be treated as a major psychological trauma or pathological reactions needing professional help.

§ Respect children’s responses and allow them time and opportunities to express them in a way that they are comfortable with.

§ Attend to immediate needs of the children and be supportive.

§ Be sensitive to children with special needs, such as children with disabilities.

§ Be kind, calm, and attempt to explain everything that is being done, even if you are not sure that they understand you.

Reference: Separated Children: Care and Protection of Children in Emergencies A Field Guide. Save the Children Federation 2004

This document has been drafted by the Psychosocial Support Programme of the IWTHI Trust. Please send in your comments and feedback to pspcp@eol.lk. If you have any concerns or clarifications, please call 011 4516408 or 0777423445.
31st December 2004

Psychosocial Aspects of the Tsunami Disaster

Got e following fr my boss....

Psychosocial Aspects of the Tsunami Disaster
What You Can Do Right Now to Support Wellbeing

People in these areas may be experiencing many different emotional and physical responses at this time. Some of these responses include confusion, fear, hopeless, sleeplessness, crying, difficulty in eating, headaches, body aches, anxiety, and anger. They may be feeling helpless; some may be in a state of shock; others may be aggressive, mistrustful, feeling betrayed, despairing, feeling relieved or guilty that they are alive, sad that many others have died, and ashamed of how they might have reacted or behaved during the critical incidents. There may be some experiencing a sense of outrage, shaken religious faith, loss of confidence in themselves or others, or sense of having betrayed or been betrayed by others they trusted.

These are all normal reactions to extremely dangerous or stressful situations. They do not mean that these people are traumatised, mentally disturbed or mentally ill.

You may be able to support people get through these normal reactions while meeting their basic and other practical needs by following the suggestions below.

DOs
§ Do listen to people who share their stories, if necessary again and again.
§ Do be friendly, compassionate and caring, even if people are angry or demanding.
§ Do give practical help or assistance to people as and when required.
§ Do help people to contact others either through post or making telephone calls on their behalf.
§ Do engage people in meeting their own needs.
§ Do find out where the government and non-government services are located and direct people to the appropriate services available in the area.
§ Do understand the emotions of people who have suffered losses, and take them seriously. There is no right or wrong way for people to feel, given the horrific situation.
§ Do give reliable information about what tsunamis are and how they occur. This will help people understand the situation.
§ Do protect people from further harm, as they may be vulnerable to assault and abuse by those who are taking advantage of the chaotic situation.

DON’Ts
§ Don’t force people to share their stories with you, especially very personal details. If they don’t want to talk much, do not disturb them.
§ Don’t tell people what you think they should be feeling, thinking or doing.
§ Don’t make promises about what you will do for them, if you are not sure about this.
§ Don’t give simple reassurances to people, saying ‘everything will be ok’, or ‘at least you have survived’ or ‘others have suffered more than you’.
§ Don’t tell people why you think they have suffered, especially giving reasons about their personal behaviours or beliefs.
§ Don’t tell people what you think they should have or could have done, whilst in the critical situation, especially to save loved ones.
§ Don’t criticise existing services and activities being carried out in these areas, especially in front of people who are in need of these services. Support the service providers to make the services better.
§ Don’t separate surviving family members and relatives from one another, if possible, especially children.
§ Don’t label people as traumatised.

This document has been drafted by the College of Psychiatry, Colombo and the Psychosocial Support Programme of the IWTHI Trust. Please send in your comments and feedback to pspcp@eol.lk. If you have any concerns or clarifications, please call 011 4516408 or 0777423445.

lame vs funny

e line between being lame & funny is really blur......

singlish.....so damned funny....

fr http://www.talkingcock.com/html/lexec.php?op=LexView&lexicon=lexicon

CORRIGHT
The proper and correct Singlish pronunciation of 'correct'; illustrates how Singlish can combine two related words, creating a new word with improved potency. Often used as a response when the truth is glaringly obvious.

OR-BI-GOOD (Contributed by Roger Ng)
Not the name of a Singaporean Jedi Knight, this is a Singlish term which is used to express that someone deserves his current predicament. Often said while making an action like a chicken flapping its wing, with arm curled, and the elbow hitting one's side. Of unknown derivation.
"Ah Seng is such a ya-ya papaya. Now he fail his 'N' Level, or-bi-good!"

BIN CHOW CHOW
Hokkien phrase literally meaning, "smelly face". Used to describe someone with a grumpy look and sour disposition.
"I do'wan to talk to him, lah. He always so bin chow chow one."

Row for a Cause

happy....

i'm quite happy wif my job at SCS......(i hope i dun jinx it....) i'm busy wif lit search & also e numerous journal articles tt i've 2 read......but i'm happy wif it actually......i'm weird!!!!

050101

didn't get 2 c e stars.....didn't get 2 c e sunrise.....but i was happy, contented, & a really serene peace enveloped my heart when we left 2 have lunch......smehow i tink i started 2005 wif smething really gd!!!! i started 2005 wif peace in my heart.....even though i shed my 1st tears, i felt really gd.....my eyes stung when i cried.....i didn't know y i cried in e 1st place.....then i cried cos e others were crying......

i dunno y we have such camaraderie.....e 4 o us....smehow we seem 2 have endless 2 talk abt.....smehow i can speak fr my heart wif u......e 4 o us......so different......i dunno how 2 describe e 4 o us......we can b so lame at times yet speak wif so much truth & enlightenment.....i tink we have mo qi......take e WLD game.......no matter how ugly e drawings r, we seem 2 know wat 1 another is drawing.......

i'm glad tt i've such a friendship......i doubt any1 in e world cld b as fortunate as me......

i've grown up a lot......talking 2 u......i tink i grew up.......

i seriously hope tt we can have another overnite chat.......everytime we talk i grow up......i become more aware o myself......

torchic---e 3 pple i mention in ur letter, i tink e 1 i took advantage o, i tink i may not 1 2 treat as a friend only.....i was a little sad & worried 4 him when i know where he went.....he's a gd person....is it compassion or smething more? i dunno.......

ultra---who did u get 2 know more???? us???? or sme1 significant?????

owl---i'm glad tt u took e step......i dunno if i'm in any position 2 tell u abt love......but u can count on me 2 lend u my shoulders......

P.S. shld we pop down 2 bintan 1 o these days???? i 1 2 c e stars........e shooting stars......

041231......

last day o 2004......raining all day.....i hope e skies will clear 2nite.....i 1 2 go star gazing......i 1 2 c e 1st sunrise o 2005.....i 1 2 c e last sunset o 2004 also but i tink i wld b sleeping after i get home so tt i can tahan e stay 2nite......everytime i look at sunset or sunrise, or e blue sky, or e stars, i feel so minute.....i feel great actually......cos it makes all my problems seem smaller......4 tt few secs tt i marvel at nature, i'm relaxed & happy.....

taking abt death......ultra say she's not ready 2 die yet.......neither m i.....but if god really ask me 2 take e place 4 sme1 else, i tink i'll agree......cos i feel tt god must have a reason y he asked me 2 take tt place......

anyway, he sent me sme1 2day but i didn't take e opportunity again.....he's testing me mayb? been reflecting alot more these few days as i wrote letters 2 my very close friends....as i write i tink.....i hope i've been gd tis yr......although i know i haven been.......